Guilt is a cunning weapon in the armory of the compulsive gambler. We can use the weapon against ourselves in many subtle ways; it can be deftly wielded, for example, in an attempt to convince us that the Gamblers Anonymous Program doesn’t really work. I have to protect myself constantly against guilt and self-accusations concerning …
When I least expect it, my keen addictive mind will try to divert me back toward my old ideas and old ways. My mind is expert, in fact, at planting and nourishing negative feelings within me—feelings such as envy, fear, anxiety, or guilt. The minute I spot any of these poisonous feelings rising up, I …
Some of us, new in Gamblers Anonymous, couldn’t resist telling anyone who would listen just how terrible we were. Just as we often exaggerated our modest accomplishments by pride, so we exaggerated our defects through guilt. Racing about and confessing all, we somehow considered the widespread exposure of our sins to be true humility, considering it a great spiritual …
A friend in Gamblers Anonymous taught me to look at excessive guilt in an entirely new way, suggesting that guilt was nothing but a sort of reverse pride. A decent regret for what has happened is fine, he said. But guilt, no. I’ve since learned that condemning ourselves for mistakes we’ve made is just as …
Few of us are entirely free from a sense of guilt. We may feel guilty for things we’ve said or done—of things we’ve left unsaid or undone. We’re so used to that gnawing guilt that even when we’re accused falsely we still feel guilty. When I’m troubled by naggings of guilt, obviously I can’t put …
Adjusting myself to things as they are, and being able to love without trying to interfere with or control anyone else, however close to me—that’s one of the important things I search for and can find in Gamblers Anonymous. The learning is sometimes painful; however, the reward is life itself—full and serene. Is the Program …
The Gamblers Anonymous Program teaches me that not too many people can truthfully assert that they love everybody. Most of us have to admit that we’ve loved only a few, and that we’ve been quite indifferent to many. As for the rest, well, we’ve really disliked or hated them. We in Gamblers Anonymous find we …
Acceptance is a key. Too often I was unable to accept who I was, and therefore it was impossible to accept others. Before coming to Gamblers Anonymous, I hid from the truth because I was afraid of it. Now with the help of my GA brothers and sisters, I can walk through it. Today I …
The beginning of love is to let those we love be perfectly themselves, and not to twist them to fit our own image, wrote Thomas Merton. Otherwise, we love only the reflection of ourselves we find in them. As I replace my self-destructive addiction with a healthy dependence on the Gamblers Anonymous Program and its Twelve Steps, I’m …
In the process of learning to love myself and, in turn, to love others freely with no strings attached, I’ve begun to understand these words of St. Augustine: Love slays what we have been, that we may be what we were not. More and more, I feel the enormous power of such love in the Gamblers Anonymous …